Haifa is an acquired taste. We didn’t fall in love at first sight. She seemed really unsure of herself. A wannabe Tel Aviv, but with these Jerusalem-style neighborhoods. And that thing where she’s the reverse of the whole world — the closer you get to the sea, the more the neighborhoods turn into slums. What’s your deal, Haifa?
And Haifa people. You won’t admit it, but you know it too. They’re different. Well. Can’t explain it.
Until it hit me. What Elijah the Prophet said in Haifa — that is, on the Carmel. He gathered the whole people at the top of the Carmel and shouted at them, “How long will you keep hopping between two opinions?” In our words: make up your minds — you can’t have it both ways!
And that’s Haifa’s thing to this day. She hops between all the opinions and tells me: I’m both-and, so stop trying to define me already.
I have everything in me. A bit of every option. I have loads of Haredim. And the most left-wing seculars there are. And Arabs in gorgeous neighborhoods. And religious Zionists. And Baha’is. And churches. And I’m mountain air clear as wine like Jerusalem, and a beach and buzzing streets like Tel Aviv. And I’m the city with the most kinds of transportation in the Middle East because I haven’t decided yet what suits me: an underground railway and an elevated one, a cable car, a seaport, an airport, buses, and a scooter. I want a bit of everything, I hop between all the options, and I enjoy it immensely.
Not feeling it? Go on then, off you go. There’s a direct train from here to Modi’in.
Man, Haifa. You’ve won me over.
And listen to another thing. Haifa sits on the Carmel. Do you know what the name Carmel means in Hebrew?
Wheat that hasn’t fully ripened, but whose kernels you can already eat. That is, not unripe, but not fully ripe either. In ancient times it was a delicacy. In spring they would grind the moist kernels and eat them. “Geres carmel” — groats of fresh grain (Leviticus 2:14). That’s Haifa. Carmel. In-between. And the most delicious.
So this year, instead of the classic Israeli vacation of the Jordan River and the Kinneret, we went to Haifa, green and beautiful all year round.
And it was a blast. And the Haifa people. Oh, the Haifa people, pure gold. And today Haifa and I are BFFs and we fell in love, and how lucky you’re here, Haifa, to remind us that sometimes you can throw on a pile of mismatched clothes and still look stunning.
