Jews of Mizrahi descent, I know you think your food is the best seasoned, but we Ashkenazim have a special spice you don’t: freezing.
I know, you’ll tell me that doesn’t count as a spice, but what can I say — it improves the taste of the food. I swear, today I took a package of schnitzel from two weeks ago out of the freezer, heated it up in a pan — and it came out tastier than the original. Crispier, somehow. The Moroccan meatballs I make (what’s Moroccan about them? Good question. The cinnamon) also come out far fluffier after a long exile in the Siberia of the freezer. I swear to you.
I may be half Turkish, but I keep my father’s house tradition of freezing. I have good friends from the warm communities who absolutely refuse to try this spice. For them, if it’s not fresh, you don’t eat it. The meat, the rice — everything has to be from today. From today? Straight from the pot.
It breaks my heart to hear this. It is a disrespect to our tradition. They say the last dish requested by the martyrs on the rivers Rhine and Danube was kneidlach that had been frozen. For us, the taste of home is Strauss ice cream tubs filled with frozen food. Rice in a block. Meatballs in a block. Soup in the shape of the tub.
And this is no free-for-all, mind you. We have clear codes on the matter.
Food from Shabbat may be eaten until the following Wednesday.
Schnitzels and meatballs: up to a month in the freezer.
Charoset from Passover: until next Passover.
Leftovers from the bar mitzvah catering: until they’re finished, provided the Jubilee year does not pass.
Okay, all this talk has made me hungry. I’m off to defrost myself a surprise tub from my bar mitzvah.
